Well, I tried singing, reading the Word, talking to my family but I can't shake the feeling of anger that has taken over my heart. So, I will process with you, dear reader, and maybe I will get it off my chest once and for all.
Backround: Gondor is having the worst winter in 25 years. It has been darn cold and the utilities have consequently suffered badly. Our dam is out of water and we have severe power shortages. This means that for the last couple of weeks we have had no power from 10 to 5 am and pm. But worse than that the villages outside of Minas Tirith where I live have had no electricity at all for over a month. Many people have died in the cold including newborn babies in cold hospitals. This kind of crisis brings out the best and the worst in people depending on their charactor. Our believing friends have done great, bearing inconveniences patiently and serving others. The Government officials have responded with a spate of new fees and regulations designed to milk every penny they can out of local people and us International NGO's. This has been getting steadily more annoying to me but today I just about lost it.
We have not had water for more than a month now as all the lines are frozen. I walked into the office this afternoon and had to leave again quickly before I blew up. Three men from the water department had barged into our office and were demanding back payment for supposedly outstanding bills from 1996. They want about $50. It is not about the money. It is about my temper and the fact that I have not had a bath in six weeks. They will come again tomorrow and I am asking all who read this to pray for me. If God blesses me with more grace than I can currently find in my heart I will deal with these guys tomorrow morning and move on to serve the people he sent me to. If I face them without such grace this blog may be closed as I get deported for physically assaulting the water guys.
Grace grace God's grace, grace that is greater than all our sins.... I need MORE!
UPDATE: So, you guys must have prayed hard because today our water came back! Of course, we didn't have electricity all day but now that is back too. I met with the water guys and they were somewhat reasonable, or at least I was. So, thanks to all who prayed. It is a small victory in the midst of a big crises but hey, one step at a time.